Why I Don’t Emphasize Buzzwords in Healing: A Conscious Choice to Create Space
The Fine Line Between Helping You Heal and Keeping You Stuck
For many of us who have experienced trauma, it’s common to feel pulled toward labels—complex PTSD, narcissistic abuse, autism spectrum, neurodivergence. These words are everywhere, and they certainly help many people understand their struggles. They can provide a sense of validation, a reason behind the chaos we’ve experienced. But I’ve noticed that while these labels spur our process of healing, they can also keep us stuck. They can become distractions, keeping us endlessly searching, identifying, and justifying our experiences without creating the space we need to truly move forward. For many, they become a full-time identity.
As a life-long lover of all things psychology and self-help, I stand by the power of a diagnosis. But
recently, I stumbled across a woman’s videos on healing from complex PTSD. Her insights were so relatable that I felt all that tingly excitement of Christmas morning. Hearing that what you exerience every day from someone else makes you feel seen and validated. I needed more! And so I went to the next video, then the next.
But within a few videos, I noticed a familiar pattern. I was eagerly checking off boxes, recognizing myself in her words, and feeling that “aha” moment with each new piece of information. Each video felt like it was adding something… until it wasn’t. In reality, I was filling my mind, but not in a way that actually helped me heal. The more I watched, the less space I had to actually process and move forward. I was stuck in a cycle, consuming without truly digesting.
This cycle is what I call the “self-help trap.” It feels productive at first—every insight resonates, every label fits, every new video offers fresh validation. But instead of moving forward, we end up circling the same ideas. We find ourselves identifying with the labels rather than breaking free of them. Each buzzword we add to our mental library starts to create an identity around the pain, subtly keeping us locked in place.
The realization made me step back. I'd been having a back and forth tug with myself because I was happy with the content I was producing yet the "shoulds" were telling me to niche down more to specific trauma terms and buzzwords. All of that lights me up to learn about and talk about, yet I was fighting against doing it. Hmmm. I saw that by avoiding buzzwords and labels, I had actually created space to heal. Now, I’m making that choice consciously. While I want people to know that I understand the experiences of trauma, narcissistic abuse, or complex PTSD, I don’t want these words to take over. Because healing isn’t just about identifying problems; it’s about moving beyond them.
What Does “Creating Space” Look Like?
For me, creating space means breaking the cycle of consumption, be it a bedside table of self-help books or endless scrolling of TikTok. It’s a reminder to limit how much I seek external validation for my experiences and instead spend more time on actions that truly nurture me. This might mean practicing mindfulness, journaling about specific steps I can take, or setting boundaries on how much time I spend watching or reading self-help content.
Labels vs. Steps Forward: Finding Balance
Labels have value—they can offer clarity and a sense of understanding. But they’re not a destination. Rather than focusing on finding “one big solution” that aligns with a diagnosis, I’ve come to see healing as a series of small, mindful steps. One-size-fits-all solutions can leave us feeling more lost because healing is so deeply individual. Embracing that individuality and focusing on small actions can bring more authentic progress.
Steps to Move Forward
If you feel caught in the self-help cycle, here are a few ways to create space:
Set Boundaries on Content Consumption: Limit the amount of time you spend on self-help videos, articles, and social media. Try setting a timer or choosing specific times of the day for this kind of content.
Journal About Actions, Not Labels: Instead of writing about why you feel a certain way, focus on what you can do next. Write down small steps you can take today that move you forward.
Practice Mindfulness: Start with a few deep breaths and bring your awareness to the present moment. Mindfulness can help interrupt the cycle of overthinking and reconnect you with yourself.
Recognize When Labels Are Helping—and When They’re Holding You Back: Use labels as a tool for understanding, not as a defining part of who you are.
Remember: Your Healing Journey is Unique
Healing is, above all, a deeply personal and unique journey. It’s about learning to trust your inner voice and following the twisty, turny path that works best for you. If you find that focusing on labels truly feels like it’s moving you forward, follow that instinct. Trust what resonates with you, even if it doesn’t fit the conventional path. What matters most is that you are honoring your journey in a way that feels right to you. Healing is not about forcing a perfect solution but about finding what helps you grow, one step at a time.
By stepping back from the noise, creating space, and trusting yourself, you give yourself the best chance to heal, grow, and rediscover who you truly are.
Healing Resources
If you haven't done so already, head to my resource page and find some free healing resources that resonate with you.
