Let Yourself Wander: The Power of Trusting Your Unique Healing Journey

There’s No Perfect Path to Healing—And That’s Okay

We’re often sold the idea that healing is a straight line—a neat path that leads from “broken” to “whole” if we just find the right solution. The perfect book, meditation, therapy, or routine. And when we don’t feel that spark of transformation right away, it’s easy to believe we’re doing something wrong. That belief can keep us stuck for years.

But here’s the truth: healing isn’t linear. There’s no one-size-fits-all solution. Sometimes, healing looks like wandering—backward, sideways, and in circles—before we stumble upon a tiny spark that feels real.

The Myth of the “Perfect Solution”

Many years ago, I was sitting by the creek in Boulder, Colorado, when a man joined me. He had the

kind of presence that made you feel calm just being near him. We started talking, and out of nowhere, he said something that stayed with me forever: “All who wander are not lost, and all that sparkles is not gold.”

That simple truth moved into my mind and has stayed there ever since. Looking at my need to heal after decades of narcissistic abuse, I realized that I’d been searching for the shiniest solution—the perfect “golden” answer to fix my life. But healing doesn’t come in a single, glittering epiphany. Sometimes, the wandering is the healing. The trial and error, the moments when nothing makes sense—that’s where growth quietly takes root.

The Problem with Shiny Things and Neat Labels

Sometimes, what sparkles looks like "the answer" because it worked for someone else. You see testimonials, stories, and experts saying, “This is the way.” So, you try it—and when it doesn’t work, you feel broken. But maybe it wasn’t your timing. Maybe that solution was never meant to be your perfect fit.

Or maybe it’s only part of the puzzle. Healing isn’t about finding one perfect method—it’s about gathering pieces from many places and weaving them together into something uniquely yours.

We do this with labels too. Social media is full of conversations about mental health, and they’ve made so many of us feel seen and validated. But sometimes, labels can trap us. We get so caught up in naming things—diagnosing our every action—that we forget to simply experience life.

That man by the creek told me something else that has stuck with me for years. I had gotten distracted by a bird and struggled to remember its name. He looked at me and said, “The bird is no less beautiful because you don’t know its name.”

That moment changed how I see everything. We don’t have to label every experience to make it valid. We can just sit with it. Healing doesn’t always need a diagnosis, a name, or a step-by-step guide. Sometimes, it’s enough to notice the beauty of the moment and let it be.

Wandering as a Form of Trust

When you stop looking for one perfect solution or a linear path to healing, you make space for tiny

sparks of insight, hope, and change. You allow yourself to wander, and in that wandering, you start to trust yourself again. You learn that it’s okay to take pieces from different places, to backtrack, and to pause when you need to.

It’s okay if something that worked for someone else doesn’t work for you. You are allowed to be unique. Your circumstances are different, and so is your path.

Healing Is Messy—and That’s Where the Magic Is

The truth is, healing rarely looks like a glow-up montage with soft music and perfect timing. It’s messy. It’s nonlinear. And sometimes, it’s downright discouraging. But in the middle of that mess, there are sparks—the tiniest moments of peace or clarity that remind you that you’re not stuck forever.

Healing doesn’t ask you to follow someone else’s roadmap. It asks you to stay open, to wander, and to trust that the spark you’re following—even if it’s small and faint—is enough to lead you somewhere new.

The Takeaway

If you’re feeling stuck or frustrated because you haven’t found “the answer,” take a breath. You don’t need to fix everything all at once. You don’t even need to know the name of what’s happening to you.

Let yourself wander. Let yourself pick up pieces from different places and trust that they’ll come together when they’re meant to. And when you catch a spark—no matter how small—don’t dismiss it. Those sparks are breadcrumbs leading you back to yourself.

You don’t need one big solution. You just need space for tiny moments of healing to unfold.

Read about my first tiny step to healing or take your first little steps with some free downloads to gently get you started.