Setting Boundaries with Crazy Makers: How to Reclaim Your Peace in a World Full of Gaslighters

Crazy Makers: How to Set Boundaries with People Who Defy Logic (and Keep Your Sanity Intact)

If you’ve ever felt as though reality itself is under siege—like you’re surrounded by people who are bending the rules of logic and rewriting the facts—congratulations, you’ve met a Crazy Maker. And if you’re feeling utterly exhausted from the last few years of trying to make sense of the senseless, you’re not alone.

This isn’t a simple difference of opinion. Crazy Makers operate in a way that’s fundamentally disorienting; you find yourself questioning your reality, feeling compelled to explain even the most obvious truths, only to be met with responses that defy logic.

The thing about Crazy Makers—whether they’re toxic partners, manipulative family members, or political figures who deny that they said what they literally just said ON CAMERA—is that they’re masters of creating chaos and leaving you holding the mental baggage. They love to twist facts, gaslight, and deny the undeniable, forcing you to question what you know to be true.

The Mental Whiplash of the Absurd

For most people, conversation is straightforward. You share a feeling or thought, they respond, and the

exchange flows naturally. But with Crazy Makers, it’s a different story. You might say, “I feel really sad about this situation,” or even something as innocuous as, “I think the sky looks particularly blue today,” only to have them launch into an argument that feels like it belongs in an alternate reality. Before you know it, you’re stuck in a mental loop, wondering how a simple statement turned into an emotional wrestling match.

You end up feeling like a cartoon character, shaking your head back and forth, trying to make sense of their logic that doesn’t compute. If you’re a people pleaser (hello!), this dynamic is even more complicated. Crazy Makers have a way of triggering your inner urge to make peace, to accommodate, or even to find where you might have gone “wrong.” You’re left scrambling to fit their bizarre responses into some logical framework, usually at the expense of your own emotional well-being. Personally, I have a black belt in playing it down. "Gee golly, I'm making too much of this. That lie wasn't soooo bad...." Self-gaslight much? Geeze.

The Trap of Trying to Get Them to “See It”

One of the most insidious parts of dealing with Crazy Makers is the compulsion to make them “see” the truth. The truth, after all, feels so obvious that you can’t help but think, “If I just explain it one more time, they’ll understand.”

But Crazy Makers are skilled at deflection. They double down, change the subject, or throw out accusations that leave you more tangled than before. Suddenly, what started as a simple statement has spiraled into a confusing argument, and you’re left feeling like the only logial solution left is to bang your head against the wall for a few hours.

The irony is that the more obvious the truth seems to you, the more determined they are to deny it. This creates a trap: the more you try to convince them, the more you feel frustrated and powerless. It’s a cycle designed to wear you out.

Setting Boundaries and Reclaiming Your Peace

Any of this hitting home? If you’re nodding, you’re probably more than ready for some serious Crazy Maker strategies. Because the thing about trying to “convince” them, to “explain,” to reason, is that it doesn’t work. Ever. Never ever ever ever. They live in a world of their own making, and if you step in, you’re just adding fuel to their fire.

So, how do you step out of this exhausting dance? It starts with boundaries, both internal and external. When you recognize that certain people are Crazy Makers, you can make intentional choices about when and how to engage with them.

Here are a few powerful tools to help you reclaim your peace:

1. Set Boundaries and Limit Engagement

   

   
   You can’t control the way Crazy Makers respond, but you can control how often and to what extent you interact with them. Crazy Makers will pull you into endless loops of argument and chaos if you let them, so boundaries are essential. This might mean limiting your conversations with them or choosing not to engage in specific discussions. The key is to remember that you don’t owe anyone endless explanations. When you feel that urge to defend yourself, stop and ask, “Do I want to engage?” More often than not, the answer is no. Remember, “No” is a full sentence. You’re allowed to disengage when someone is trying to distort your reality.

2. Use Humor as a Shield
   Sometimes, humor can be a surprisingly effective way to cope with the absurd. It’s not about laughing off serious issues; it’s about giving yourself a mental break. By seeing the humor in their extreme logic gaps, you can distance yourself emotionally from their attempts to undermine your peace. If you are too wound up to laugh, just give yourself a nudge to let it go by saying the word "absurd" to yourself because absurd does not warrant you getting so wound up.

3. Shift Your Mind Back to Your Sparks
   Crazy Makers thrive on drama and confusion. They want you caught up in their world. Instead, focus on the people and passions that genuinely nourish you. Think of how much energy you’d have if you didn’t waste it trying to convince someone who simply refuses to listen. Every time you feel the urge to rehash an argument or wonder how they could think what they think, turn your focus back to yourself. Your peace is more important than their opinions. When you shift your focus away from them, you reclaim that energy for yourself.

4. Don’t Take the Bait
   Crazy Makers are pros at pushing buttons—they want you to react, to jump in, to try and change their minds so they can prove how silly or stupid you are. When someone responds to your thoughtful post with “You’re completely wrong." Period. (Ironically - or is this not ironically?- I just got that comment on my post about the Gaslight Election.) Recognize that for what it is: an invitation into Crazy Maker territory. I used to say to politely respond and walk away but honestly, it is best to not engage at all. Take a breath and be done.

5. Let That Absurdity Go
   The trap of Crazy Makers is that we feel an almost compulsive need to make them see what is so clearly true. But here’s the thing: they don’t want to see it. They thrive on the confusion, the argument, the constant tug-of-war. True success here isn’t convincing them; it’s keeping your own peace and protecting your energy.

An Unexpected Path to Freedom

There’s a liberating moment that comes when you realize that Crazy Makers’ responses aren’t about

you—they’re about them. Their reactions are born from their own refusal to engage with reality, not from any failing on your part. The need to endlessly explain obvious facts fades when you understand this. By choosing not to participate in their chaos, you free yourself from their cycle of mental exhaustion. Poof! Be gone Crazy Makers!

Instead of getting tangled in their arguments, you can walk away, focus on your own growth, and seek out people who bring light and joy into your life. In doing so, you reclaim not only your energy but also your peace of mind.

Embracing Your Own Spark

If there’s one takeaway, it’s this: you have the power to choose peace over the frustration of trying to “fix” a Crazy Maker. Not everyone will see things as you do—and that’s okay. Yes, even if they are batshit crazy and wronger than wrong. That's ok. Instead of questioning yourself, questioning reality, or questioning why they can’t understand, remember that their chaos doesn’t define you.

When we talk about Following Sparks, this is the heart of it. We can’t keep pouring our precious energy into the black hole of Crazy Maker arguments. Instead, we can direct that energy toward people who actually value honesty, empathy, and sanity.

Focus on what truly lights you up, on the things that add meaning and joy to your life. We're spark followers, after all! When you stop giving Crazy Makers a front-row seat in your mind, you make space for your own sparks. And that is something worth protecting.

So here’s the new plan: Let’s recognize the Crazy Makers for what they are—distractions. Let’s set boundaries, protect our peace, and spend our time with those who truly “get” us. Because we have far more important things to do than try to make sense of the senseless.

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